This afternoon I received this email from fellow
marketer and friend Jason Fladlien.
This nearly brought tears to my eyes.
Read the entire email. It's important.
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What I am about to tell you comes directly from my heart. I want to
share this with you for two reasons. First, I belief it contains one
the greatest lessons life has to offer you. Second, the shock has
wore off, and it's time I accept what is going on in my life. One of
the best ways to do that is to let it out. And I'm tired of keeping
it inside.
Let's start at the beginning...
For the last two months, I have been suffering from panic attacks,
about 3-4 a day. I'm not sure what causes them, but it has gotten to
the point that every time I go out in public I have one. I used to
have them when I was 16-21, and then from 21-25 they went away,
because I adopted the lifestyle of a monk, and spent a lot of time
meditating, exercising and eating natural foods.
Anyway, they recently have come back stronger than ever. In an
effort to get a grip on a reality again, I went to the doctor to get
some medication. However, that medication has made me sicker than
anything I have ever experienced in my life.
In fact, I went 5 days where I couldn't even get out of bed. I'm
currently working on a project with Robert Plank, and I got sick
halfway through writing the copy for our site. I finished it lying
in bed, and then proceeded not to get out of bed for 4 days
afterwards.
Actually, I am still not at 100%.
Now I'm a busy person. On top of running a full time internet
business, I also am a performing artist and a full time student at a
university. So you can imagine what being out 10 days, unable to
concentrate for more than 10 minutes at a time would do to me. To
say I'm way behind is an understatement.
So the first takeaway is to be grateful. If you're healthy, you
should be happy. Just to get out of bed and not feel like your head
is going to explode, to not dry heave for hours every day, and to be
able to go to the store without having a panic attack... that's far
more important than making a million dollars.
If you start everyday off being thankful for what you have, it's
easier to get more of what you want. That's a big lesson.
So my health started to improve around the 16th of July. By the
18th, I was finally up and on my feet again, and able to stay that
way for most of the day. The 18th of July, 2008 will probably be a
day I remember for the rest of my life.
I am 25 years old. I have a brother who is 7, and who I love dearly.
About two weeks ago, he hit his head on the diving board at a
swimming pool, and then a few days after got hit in the head again.
Afterwards, he started complaining of headaches and tingling in his
fingers and toes.
My mom took him to the hospital to get looked at. They did an MRI
and found out that he has a cancerous tumor on his brain stem. The
technical term is diffuse pontine glioma. The 18th was Friday, and
on Monday he was already receiving radiation therapy.
It's that serious.
The survival rate for diffuse pontine glioma is not good. In fact,
less than 20% survive past five years of diagnosis.
As soon as my mom told me, I rushed to the hospital to be with there
with her and my brother. After a few hours, my mom was exhausted, so
I told her to leave and get something to eat and take a break while
they moved my brother (his name is Ryan) into in-patient care.
Surprisingly, Ryan was in an excellent mood. He was not very scared.
The thing that weirded him out the most was getting hooked up to get
his vitals monitored and having to urinate into a container, so they
could measure the volume of urine.
We checked some play station games out from the hospital library, I
ordered him some food from the cafeteria, and we just hung out like
we normally would, with him actually being in one of the best moods
I had seen him in.
Strange.
My mom came back a few hours later because she was going to stay
overnight, and I left for the evening. As soon as I got out to my
car I broke down and started crying. It then dawned on me that Ryan
was being strong for me. He was the one keeping me together. Usually
it's the other way around. He's a wonderful kid brother.
Since that day I have been in a state of shock. Nothing really makes
much sense to me right now. I mean, you know that it's possible for
young children to get brain stem cancer. But it doesn't seem real
until it happens to someone you love.
The only thing I question is - how am I going to be strong for my
mother and my brother through all of this? Right now Ryan has
responded well to treatment, but the toughest challenges are ahead.
It's going to be a long, hard road.
The second takeaway is this - be thankful for the health of your
loved ones. Life is so short. If you're healthy, and your loved ones
are healthy, then you have it made. Don't forget that. That is the
best wealth that there is.
I wasn't going to share any of this with you. Jim Rohn has a saying
that I'm fond of -- "Show the marketplace your seed, not your need."
But two things lead me to decide to type this message. The first is
that I have kept this bottled up inside me, because frankly I don't
want to admit that it has happened.
If I don't talk about it, it seems like everything is fine. But the
moment I admit it publicly is the moment I have to deal with it. So
I'm ready to move out of shock and denial, and accept what has
happened and prepare for the challenges ahead.
The second reason is that I had a customer email me today. I told
him a few weeks back that I'd do a critique of his sale page. This
is a day or two before I got really sick. Then, as you know, as soon
as I got better I had to deal with my brother getting cancer.
Here was the email he sent to me today:
"What type of sickness DID you get? That must have been hell of an
aliment!"
So this was the email I typed to him in response:
"If you must know I was sick almost two weeks with an allergic
reaction to medication. Then, when I got better I had to play catch
up in my own business.
However, since you continue to pry, asking for a favor of all
things, I'll let you in on something I wasn't going to share with
any of my customers... I discovered last week my 7 year old brother
has cancer on his brain stem. So I've been in the hospital a lot
with him, and when I am at home I am mostly in a state of shock.
And I still haven't fully recovered for my allergic reaction either.
On top of all of this, my grandmother is also in the hospital, and
it looks like she isn't going to make it for very long.
And the reason I've been taking medication at all is because I've
had these terrible panic attacks, which I used to get but had
stopped, and now somehow have came back (probably because of
stress).
So pardon me for not being so quick to do you a favor. You're the
least of my concern right now."
And finally, this is the email I got back from him:
"The point is to be honest and uphold your promise to people,
especially your customers. When you said you would do something, as
a business owner, you should do it for reputation sake. I have been
extremely sincere and frank with you since the beginning, so the
least you can do is offer the same thing in return.
The thing I loathe most in this world are two-face, hypocritical
liars; I have been through this many times.
I am not accusing you of anything. I want you to know that you have
my deepest sympathy and get better.
All you had do was say that instead of dodging...
You should tell people about your situation; what is there to hide?
I know you are busy and going through a tough time so I think I
should help you do that for you. I will let people know about what
you are going through for their support.
I will ask you again in the future. "
Part of me wants to strangle this guy until his eyeballs pop out.
Part of me wants to pack up my bags, and never publish info products
again. Teaching others how to make money is only part of my
business. I could just do instead of teach and keep all my systems
to myself. I personally like to teach people because I like the
reward of helping someone else out more than the money.
But if I'm going to have to deal with people like this, then what's
the point?
Do you think I'm being unreasonable? Do you think that I should care
about my business reputation when I am not even sure how I'm going
to make it through the next year?
But more importantly, I did not want to share this personal story
with you, chiefly because I didn't want it to influence your
decision for want to purhcase more products from me in the future,
because you feel sorry for me. If I somehow profit because of my
brother's terrible misfortune, I don't think I could look at myself
in the mirror in the morning.
However, my motivation to share this with you is twofold. First, I
want to tell you from personal experience that you must take time to
spend with the ones you love. You must take time to be grateful for
what you have. You must take time to realize that life is a delicate
thing, and that you mustn't take it for granted.
At the same time, the email exchange above has left me angry and
confused. It has put additional weight on my shoulders to add on to
everything else I have been carrying around. So I wanted to get
release. I wanted to share this with you to lift off of my
shoulders.
I have not taken the time to polish this message, or to even think
about what I was going to say next. I have just spoken directly from
my heart, and said exactly what was on my mind.
If this message reaches just one person, and makes them grateful for
all they have, and less worried about what they don't have, I will
consider this a success. If this message enhance just one
relationship, then I will consider this a success.
If this helps you somehow get more from life, instead of just get
through life, I will consider it a success.
Frankly, it's the hope that this will reach and touch someone else
out there that is keeping me going right now.
Thanks,
Jason
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Jason has a great product at:
http://3hourad.com/
(That's a straight link to his website.)
Check it out. And if you think it might be good for you,
kindly give him some support.
Have a nice day,
'Stuttering' John and Kevin Nguyen
http://CrackingOnlineWealthCode.com
P.S. "... you must take time to spend with the ones you love.
You must take time to be grateful for what you have. You must
take time to realize that life is a delicate thing, and that you mustn't
take it for granted."
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